Fancy being an armpit sniffer, Mosquito bite victim, sewer diver or marine snot collector? No? We didn't think so

你是不是經(jīng)常抱怨自己的工作無(wú)聊?不過(guò)且慢，如果你知道世界上有哪些工作最差，你可能會(huì)感激上蒼。英國(guó)《鏡報(bào)》就為我們盤點(diǎn)了一番全球最糟糕工作。

Talk about a boring job... Thomas Curwen watches paint dry for a living. The Dulux scientist from Twyford, Berks, 34, checks how the colour of matt and emulsion changes over time on walls and under microscopes.

談到有什么工作無(wú)聊透頂，34歲的托馬斯柯溫的工作應(yīng)該算一個(gè)。他成天盯著剛刷的油漆變干，作為多樂士專業(yè)涂料的一名科學(xué)家，他要檢查墻上或者顯微鏡下的油漆顏色如何隨時(shí)間變化。

If you think that sounds a bit dry, just wait. We’ve found there a many worse ways to earn a living around the world...

如果覺得這夠無(wú)聊，那還是等等再下結(jié)論，我們?cè)谌蛘业搅嗽S多槽糕的工作，先來(lái)一睹為快。

Armpit sniffer

嗅腋窩

Getting a whiff of BO may sound like the pits, but it’s all in a day’s work for Peta Jones.

聞些狐臭的味道聽起來(lái)不那么爽，不過(guò)，佩塔?瓊斯成天就干這種活。

She works as a deodorant producer for Unilever in Australia, developing the Dove, Lynx and Impulse brands.A big part of her job is sniffing strangers’ armpits to check her products’ work.

瓊斯是澳大利亞聯(lián)合利華集團(tuán)的除臭劑生產(chǎn)者，多芬(Dove)凌仕(Lynx)和Impulse等就是聯(lián)合利華旗下品牌。她工作的主要內(nèi)容就是嗅陌生人的腋窩，以檢驗(yàn)產(chǎn)品功效。

Peta said: “It was strange at first, but in a week it was fine.”

“剛開始這很奇怪，但干一個(gè)星期就好了。”佩塔說(shuō)。

Crime-scene cleaners

清理犯罪現(xiàn)場(chǎng)

CSI may be a morbid hit with TV viewers, but there is nothing entertaining about cleaning up a crime scene after a death.

犯罪現(xiàn)場(chǎng)調(diào)查對(duì)電視觀眾來(lái)說(shuō)不亞于打雞血，不過(guò)，死人后的犯罪現(xiàn)場(chǎng)清理就真的讓人唯恐避之不及了。

Married couple Mike Nestved and Carmen Velazquez, above, clear up after bodies in Orlando, Florida – the worst being one in a hot caravan. Carmen said: “There are some things you can’t just Febreze.”

已婚夫婦如邁克?奈斯特韋茲和卡門?貝拉斯克斯的工作就是清理佛羅里達(dá)州奧蘭多市的死人后現(xiàn)場(chǎng)，最糟糕的情況是在炙熱的拖車中。

Crocodile trainer

鱷魚訓(xùn)練員

We’ve all worked with snappy colleagues, but putting your head in a crocodile’s mouth should attract danger money.

我們或許都跟敏捷的同事一起工作過(guò)，但把頭放在鱷魚的嘴里感覺怎么樣?

Yet trainers at Pattaya Crocodile Farm, Thailand, get just ￡4 per day for their work. Another stunt involves kissing a giant croc on its nose. Ian Maclean, who filmed the show during a trip to the zoo, said: “One of the performers had his head crushed while locked in the jaws of a croc.”

這并非驚悚大片，而是謀生計(jì)的一種手段。在泰國(guó)芭堤雅鱷魚農(nóng)場(chǎng)，這樣的工作薪水只有每天4英鎊(約42元人民幣)。此外，訓(xùn)練員還有一項(xiàng)“絕技”，就是親吻一只大鱷魚的脖子。

Mosquito bite victim

主動(dòng)讓蚊子咬

Helge Zieler has a job that really sucks – letting himself get bitten by mosquitoes. Working in the Brazilian rainforest, he offered himself as bait so he could study the bugs’ behaviour.

黑爾格?齊勒的工作那才叫糟糕——請(qǐng)蚊子來(lái)咬自己。他在巴西熱帶雨林工作，為了研究蚊子的行為，他不惜“獻(xiàn)身”，自己化身誘餌吸引蚊子。

But despite once suffering a debilitating bout of malaria, he says: “The beauty of the rainforest far outweighs the thousands of mosquito bites.”

雖然齊勒曾因此而遭到了瘧疾的苦楚，但他依然興奮地表示：“對(duì)我來(lái)說(shuō)，幾千只蚊子的叮咬與熱帶雨林的美麗相比遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)不算什么。”

Pet food taster

品嘗寵物食品

This is not just pet food – this is the ultimate in Marks & Spencer dog and cat cuisine.Every dish in the store’s luxury range has been tested by Simon Allison, above.

瑪莎百貨的每一道貓和狗的“菜肴”都已由西蒙?艾利森品嘗過(guò)。

He said: “I love my job – but draw the line at swallowing.”

他說(shuō)：“我熱愛我的工作，但底線是吞咽。”

Simon chews gum after sittings to stop, er, dog breath.

休息的時(shí)候，西蒙咀嚼著口香糖，呃，太難吃了。

Sewer diver

下水道潛水員

We all think our job stinks from time to time, but it really does for Julio Cu Camara.He swims through sewers in Mexico City to clear blockages and repair pipes by hand.

我們常常抱怨我們的工作糟透了，但朱利奧?卡馬拉的工作才叫爛。他每天在墨西哥城的下水道“暢游”數(shù)小時(shí)，用雙手清理管道堵塞。

Julio, below, has notched up 1,400 dives in 30 years – each one lasting up to six hours in 7,500 miles of tunnels.He has to wear a 6.4 stone helmet and suit to protect him from the human, chemical and animal waste – and its stench.

朱利奧30年里共“潛水”1400次，每次都持續(xù)6個(gè)小時(shí)，在下水道游走的長(zhǎng)度7500英里。為了不讓自己被人為的、化學(xué)的和動(dòng)物的“廢料”及其散發(fā)的惡臭所污染，他不得不戴著頭盔。

Julio has found horses, pigs, guns and “cigarette butts to car parts, furn-iture and fridges. You ask how it got there.”But of one thing he is certain: “The worst thing of all to find is a human.”

朱利奧找到過(guò)馬尸,死豬，槍支，煙頭，汽車零部件，家具和電冰箱。但他說(shuō)，最倒霉的是在下水道找到的是人。

Watching grass grow

看著草生長(zhǎng)

If watching paint dry sounds too exhilarating, you could take a leaf out of Helen Southall’s book.

如果說(shuō)看著油漆干似乎還有點(diǎn)意思，你可以扯下海倫?索撒爾的一頁(yè)書看看。

The grass expert works at British Seed Houses in Lincoln, where her daily duties include counting out and planting 400 seed samples.Later, she goes through them blade by blade to monitor growth.

這位草評(píng)專家在林肯大學(xué)的英國(guó)種子會(huì)社(British Seed Houses)工作，她的日常職責(zé)包括計(jì)數(shù)和種植400顆種子樣本。然后，她開始一片一片葉子監(jiān)控草地生長(zhǎng)。

Helen said: “People think that it’s strange when I tell them my job is to watch grass grow.“But it’s fascinating. I wouldn’t do anything else. It’s so rewarding to see a stretch of perfect grass.”

“當(dāng)我告訴別人我的工作是盯著草地生長(zhǎng)時(shí)，他們都認(rèn)為這不可思議。但這項(xiàng)工作很有魅力，我無(wú)需做其他事情?？粗黄昝啦萜郝煺购苤档谩?rdquo;海倫說(shuō)。

Whale snot collector

收集鯨魚的鼻涕

“There she blows” may be the traditional cry for whale spotters but marine biologist Karina Acevedo-Whitehouse gives it a new meaning.She flies a remote-controlled helicopter fitted with a culture dish through the billows of mucus whales eject from their blowhole, above, then analyses it for viruses and bacteria.Karina, from the Zoological Society of London, says: “It can be quite dangerous.”

很多看到鯨魚的人一般會(huì)驚叫：“它在那噴氣”。不過(guò)，倫敦動(dòng)物學(xué)會(huì)的海洋生物學(xué)家卡琳娜?阿塞韋多?懷特豪斯給了它新的含義。她操縱著一架裝載有培養(yǎng)皿的遙控直升機(jī)，在鯨魚從其噴水孔噴出的翻滾的粘液中穿梭搜集樣本，然后用來(lái)分析病毒和細(xì)菌?？漳日f(shuō)：“這有時(shí)候相當(dāng)危險(xiǎn)。”

And now for the best jobs...

看過(guò)了差的工作，我們?cè)賮?lái)看看世界上最好的工作：

Andrew Smith, left, won a contest to become the “Chief Funster” for New South Wales in Australia. The Californian’s job is to have as much fun as possible to promote the region, which includes driving with Top Gear star The Stig.

他的工作內(nèi)容是盡可能為該地區(qū)帶來(lái)更多歡樂，包括與英國(guó)Top Gear汽車節(jié)目中的“試替哥”(The Stig)一起開車。

In March, luxury tour company VeryFirstTo advertised for a reviewer to spend a year visiting some of the world’s most expensive resorts on a trip worth more than ￡600,000. One of the destinations was Sir Richard Branson’s Caribbean retreat Necker Island.

3月，奢華旅游公司“VeryFirstTo”招聘一位評(píng)論員，他的工作職責(zé)是花一年時(shí)間游覽一些世界上最昂貴的度假圣地，其中包括理查德?布蘭森爵士遷居的加勒比海內(nèi)克爾島。完成這一趟旅行要花60萬(wàn)英鎊以上。

Five years ago, Ben Southall, right, from Petersfield, Hants, won “the best job in the world” as caretaker of Hamilton Island on the Great Barrier Reef. This the role even came with a salary of ￡70,000 for six months.

5年前，本?索撒爾贏得了“世界上最好的工作”——澳大利亞大堡礁漢密爾頓島的“護(hù)島人”。白白享受風(fēng)光還不算，他的工資也高達(dá)半年7萬(wàn)英鎊。

Internet TV network Netflix is looking for a “tagger” who will be paid to watch its best films and TV shows and help categorise them so that it can provide viewers withmore accurate recommendations.

安德魯?史密斯，澳大利亞新南威爾士州“首席幽默家”，在線影片租賃提供商“網(wǎng)飛公司”正在招募這樣一個(gè)員工，他可以拿薪水看該公司最好的電影和電視劇，并幫助分門別類，給觀眾提供更準(zhǔn)確的建議。